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A letter to my daughter

June 18, 2023    

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As I see you grow up with each passing day, I can’t help but remember how I little I can do for you, my child. How little is my control over the world you’re growing up in, or how little I can do to protect you from the challenges that will come your way. With all my love and all my efforts, I can only hope to make you strong from the inside to face anything that happens on the outside. 

I’m convinced that the world of today (and tomorrow) will tell you to be confident and chase your dreams with all your might. I’m sure that you will learn the importance of staying curious all your life, the importance of having an attitude of learning. I know that you will be inspired to take risks and hope that you find the courage to follow through on your commitments, even when things don’t seem to go your way. But I want to tell you about the things that even the world of today is not comfortable talking about, the emotions that probably everyone struggles with but hardly anyone has the courage to acknowledge or accept.

To start with, if you follow one advice from your father, let it be this: be vulnerable. Wear your heart on your sleeve, sweetheart, even if it leads to getting hurt. Never be afraid to acknowledge and express how you’re feeling, because that is the only true way to be alive in every moment of your life. In doing so, you’ll also create a safe space for others like you to join in. The joy you’ll feel this way will be unbound by the laws of reciprocation that the world will have you believe as a prerequisite for love. I know that this will also lead to pain, but embrace that pain. Know that this pain is necessary for you to grow, and that this too, is beautiful. 

Your loved ones will hurt you, in ways big and small. When pain seems to take over the reins of your relationships, look for that little corner in your heart where love still resides. Call upon that love to lead you on the path to forgiveness, for it will be as, if not more, liberating for you than for the ones who hurt you. I hope that the scars of love don’t scare you or force you to hold back in the future. Wear your scars with pride for they are testimony to your fearlessness.

Give yourself the permission to feel all the emotions that others around you have been taught to suppress, like anger, jealousy, or insecurity. Dig deeper to find out why you feel how you do. You’ll find that often, these emotions are just cover ups for something that doesn’t feel right inside. Your anger could be a cover up for pain. Your jealousy or insecurity could be trying to show the mirror to something that you don’t like about yourself. Only when you accept these emotions will you have the power to change the narrative, change what they mean in your life. And I hope that you remember that even these parts of you that you don’t like are worthy of your love. More importantly, I hope you remember that I will always love you, even the parts of you that you might take some time to love. 

I hope you tend to kindness in your heart and make it grow with each passing day. There’s nothing that the world needs more than people who are kind, to people, to other living beings, to the world, and to themselves. Your thoughts, words, and actions have an impact on the world around you and I sincerely hope that you choose kindness above all else.

In the end, remember to be thankful. Thankful to the ones who have been a part of your journey. Thankful to the opportunities and challenges that have helped shape you into someone you are proud to be. And definitely thankful to yourself, your mind, body and soul, for this wonderful experience called life.

As long as I’m alive, I will love and cherish you, and hope that you remember how much you matter to us. I also hope that I’ve been a good example for you, and that my presence in your life has been testimony to the few things that I want to pass on to you as my legacy. I want to end by sharing a few lines that have inspired me in the darkest of moments, with the hope that they do the same for you:

God has not promised, sun without rain, 

Joy without sorrow, peace without pain….

God has not promised skies always blue, 

Flower strewn pathways, all our lives through….

But God has promised strength for the day, 

Rest for the labour, light for the way…..

Grace for the trials, help from above,

Unfailing sympathy, undying love.

This article was first published by Times of India –
https://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/blogs/voices/a-letter-to-my-daughter/


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